My name is Thomas Fucaloro. I am 35. I live in the suburb of Staten Island. I am a Capricorn. I just got a cell phone. They are very odd little instruments of communication. For some reason I don't like being able to communicate with someone all the time. It's the things left unsaid that I cherish most. So far the only thing a cell phone has taught me is that other people are late a lot. You see when I didn't have a cell phone and I had to meet someone somewhere they knew because I not having one meant they were never late. Now with the cell phone in place I get constant text messages about having to be late because of crotch itch or whatever lame excuse is being offered up for sacrifice that day. So I am official plugged in and part of the problem. I smile. The cell phone just stares back at me. I put it in my pocket. My balls wait for it to vibrate.